Road Trends: The car you save may be your own

With apologies to Flannery O'Connor

Leaving Montana

You may already know this, but Dell and I basically followed the Lewis & Clark path out here to Seattle, albeit with less risk of dysentery and no guns. On the drive, we were reminded constantly of our intrepid forerunners by historic plaques - you know, the ones I like to read out loud - at rest stops along the way. Which is exactly where you need something to read: OUTSIDE the restrooms. Someone should write a letter.

In any case, the trip was hard on Lewis & Clark back in their old-timey days. Dell read on one rest area plaque that each man in the expedition ate 9 lbs of meat a day during the journey.

In modern times, however, our journey was tough on the ol' Silver Bullet.

I went to get the oil changed in the car, thinking I was being a very responsible car owner by going 400 miles early. However, to my chagrin, my car was out of oil. As in, dry. The guy told me the oil light should've come on any minute, but it was okay now. He rolled his eyes and gave me a look usually reserved for people who:

• sample more than one grape at the grocery store;
• fold women's underwear when they 'need' the dryer at the laundromat;
• pick their noses at red lights.

So I'm a bad car owner. And I always thought checking the dipstick looked so dashingly awesome; what a missed opportunity. Oh well! The Silver Bullet completed the Lewis & Clark route with no troubles after that. More to follow!